I’m taking a blog break now…
Having to take care of two babies could be a tough task to me. I don’t know if I can cope with the task without breakdown. I really hope I can handle it well. Wish me, please…..
Till then, wishing you all MERRY X’MAS & HAPPY NEW YEAR 2009…
I had a word with my sis over the phone and knowing something bad happened at home…. again. I don’t wish to reveal too much about what happened but what had happened is our nightmare. A nightmare that never ends…
I understand the burden my sis and mom had and I know they had no options can be chose for life. Many times, I wish I can share the burden with them yet I’m failed to do. Instead, I’m giving my burden (Xandria) to them.
If a women’s happiness is to marry to a loving husband, guess we are not the lucky one. Having a man who is so trashy, so selfish, so irresponsible in the family, the only thing you can do is to succumb against destiny. I wish we will be able to do so, I wish I’m sufficed to give them a better life, a peaceful life indeed. I really hope I’m able to do so very soon…
Photo taken on 29 Oct 2008…..while they were at the park nearby
Since Xandria was at 2 months old, she was under mom’s care while I’m slogging my life in JB. Along her growing moments, she has her little cousin, Jia Xin to play with, to fight with. Their relationship is more than like a cousin but sister. I can see my little loves her cousin so much….. she likes to hug her, touch her, imitate her comportment and follow her wherever she goes.
i wonder if they both have to stay apart one day, will my Xandria adapt to an environment where she is going to be alone. I hope she can….
Look, how much fun they had with the stool bought at IKEA. I wonder whose idea to opposite the stool and sit in it.
After longing for the day to arrive, finally it has come to the end of my confinement. Yes, it’s baby Xavier ‘fullmoon’ since his birth. Mean times, it’s my ‘freedom’ day too. I can do whatever I wish to, I can go wherever I want to… I can switch the air-con as cool as I wish, I can wear shorts and sleeveless, most importantly I can wash my itchy and smelly hair. Finally, I can really have a good ‘wash’ for myself.
I brought baby Xavier for his hair cut yesterday morning. Look at my little baldicoot…
Weight: 5kg
Height: no measure
Dietry: 4-5oz every 3 hourly
We did not have any special celebration for baby Xavier’s fullmoon because of my passed experience during Xandria’s fullmoon. Just a simple dinner with some close relatives… Although it’s a simple dinner, the ‘angpow’ I received for this little boy is pretty luscious. Never thought….
Compared to Xandria, baby Xavier seems rarely smile, in fact he grunted and whined most of the time. He whined:
- when he is hungry
- when he is farting or poo
- when he is been left alone
- when he is not comfortable with the way being carried
- when he is tired and need to be carried
- when he is giving water instead of milk (he is very defensive against water)
- when his pacifier drop from his mouth
When he is almost to sleep, he needs to carry in arm and pat to sleep. Imagine how demanding he is. Both CL and I indeed have to take turn to carry him.
As for my breastfeeding project, I’m failed to nurse my boy with just BM because lack of supportive from people surrounding. He is mixing with milk powder. At first week, he is gulping for 2oz of milk and now, he is able to gulp 4oz milk every 2 ½ to 3 hours. Sometimes, can up to 5oz of milk.
Taking care of a newborn baby can be really tiring especially night time. Over passed few days, I didn’t really have a good sleep. My baby Xavier seems likes to stay away during night time, from 12am to 4am. I really cannot understand why. Some says he has been sleeping too much during day time, while some says he has yet to discern day and night.
Many times, I find him cried aloud even in his afternoon nap especially whenever he is poo or fart. I’m guess if the colic caused him stomachache, sol I gave him the colic medicine from paed. It seems work and he can sleep well without crying.
Thought of having a CL, she should be able to taking care of him when he staying awake and I can have a peaceful sleep, who knows the CL seems like scolding him for not sleep. Till then, I started to monitor her and scarified my sleeping time. At times, if I find her unable to settle down my boy, I need to carry him in my arms and pat him to sleep. Usually, it takes almost an hour for him to sleep. Oh gosh… it really tiring.
My confinement war yet to end after I had my 3rd confinement lady aged 38 (the first 2 CL was aged end 40’s and 50’). Overall, she is acceptable. She cooked whatever I requested, she cleaned up milk bottle as taught, she take care my boy the way I told.
At first, I thought I shouldn’t have any complaints about her. Whatever she did, I tried to compromise. Somehow, I found my endurance has up to my limitation when she seems like to use harsh word when taking care of my boy, especially middle of night. Yes, my boy seems love to stay awake between 12am till 4am. Almost every night, I got to hear those bad words out from her mouth. Until one night, I had to tell stop scolding my son and I take care my boy myself. Guess she noticed I am very upset with her doing and immediately turned her voice to a soothing tune.
Not only that, I found she loves to talk over the phone. Sometimes, I noticed she can talk almost half an hour, which she supposes to take a rest. See, she is wasting her time by talk on the phone when she has given time for a nap. Even when feeding my boy, she can still talk on the phone. With a hand holding a phone, another arm cuddling my boy and hand holding bottle. Believe it??
I understand she own her personal time, nevertheless I expected priority should be given to my boy. Somehow, she is more concern on all incoming calls. I don’t know if I’m too fussy or having high expectation toward CL, at times I find so hard to accept the way they do thing.
Sighhh…. why is that so hard to find a good CL??
How time flies…it seems I had just updated on Xandria’s 14 months no longer ago. Now that she is 15 months old as on 10 December.
What can she do at 15 months? She can:
• Understand most of the word we tell
• Talk with single word like ‘po’ for grandma (mom), ‘di’ for daddy, ‘kak’ for kakak (maid), card, car and bag but not ‘mi’ for mommy.
• sing along with her cousin when watching children song
• hold pencil and trying scratching table, chair “headache”
• hold milk bottle herself, finally…
• eat a lot, more than 3 meals a day but her weight yet to put on much
• whining and being very demanding when her request not being fulfill
• walk steadily without aided
Weight: 9.7kg
Height: no measure…
Teeth: 4 upper teeth, 4 lower teeth and 1 is sprouting…
Thought of attaching her latest photo, but she has been so sick (fever, flu, running nose) since her last visit to me. Poor little Xandria for having a sickly 15 month!!!
HAPPY 15 mth old, little Xandria. Mommy loves you….
Xandria was brought to stay with me for a couple of hours over the weekend. It was so good to be able to spend time with her. Indeed, I’m glad she still remembers her mommy here.
When she is here with me, she was busying …
…… exploring my laptop
……trying to press on the ‘power’ button
….. tearing all stickers on my laptop
The next moment when she saw my handphone placed on the bed, this is what she did…
she put the phone next to her ear and said….’alohhh’, ‘alohh’!
It’s finally Friday… daddy is coming back.
After longing for his return, he has finally back now. I should feel relief with his present. Somehow, it turned to be very depressive. I don’t feel good at all. In fact, I feel his present put me to the edge of corner. At times, I find myself can’t even breathe with his treat. When we had argument, he expected me not to be so sensitive toward things surrounding, he expected me to let go all the bad thoughts, he expected me to understand that he don’t feel good when argument happened every time he back.
Sometimes, I find so hard to communicate with him. No matter how hard I tried, he seems unable to understand. Many times, I’ve told him my worry about our future life with another child. I don’t know why, but I keep on worry about it. Was it the cause of an unplanned pregnancy?? I love my boy…the more I look at him, the more I can’t resist loving him more…
What happened to me now?? Was it so called post-natal blue??
